How to Make a First Date Lead to More Dates

First impressions matter a lot in every field of human endeavour and that includes dating. First dates are very important relationship foundation layers and ultimately help define the course of a relationship.  If you are looking to going on a long term relationship, then it is imperative that you make your first date the best as it usually turns out to be the most memorable of dates.  Here are a few rules on how to make your first date work and lead to more dates in the future.

 

Don't Make a First Date A Movie Date: This is because you can't get to know someone while watching a movie.  Movie dates should at least be for later dates when you are familiar and have known a lot about each other and don't really need to talk much.  Rather choose to go to a restaurant or park and not the movies. 

 

Don’t Bring A Friend to A First Date: First dates are meant for two people. First of all, only the two of you will be in the relationship, therefore, three or more people would be a crowd.  Inviting your friend or family shows that you aren't interested in your date or that you are nervous to be alone with them.  It will just be plain awkward to bring another person as this will no longer make it a date but some kind of mini get-together. 

 

Avoid Engaging in Distracting Activities: Leave your work or home behind when going on a First Date.  It's rude to text while on the date or to be constantly on the phone. Your date deserves your full attention to show that you are engaged into the conversation and generally interested in what they are saying and not for them to think you are ignoring them or there is someone or some other thing going on for you that is far more interesting than the date.

 

Don’t Kiss: This may sound a bit old-fashioned but it is well on track not to kiss on a first date.  Kissing on a first date could spell bad luck or make you appear easy to get with. Plus it’s very tacky because your date is technically a stranger as this is your first time with that person! If the first date goes well, be sure there will be other dates for such closeness.

 

Don’t Lie or Tell Half-Truths: Do not lay the foundation of your relationship on a lie or half-truths.  There's the tendency your date will find out the complete truth someday it may be difficult for them to trust what comes out of your mouth subsequently. 

 

Don't Pretend to Be Who You Are Not:  Be yourself.  Don't claim to be who or what you aren't.  This will mean creating a deceptive image of who you really are which may eventually give birth to problems in the future of your relationship. 

 

Don’t Talk About Exes: Don’t talk about your ex; it only goes to show that you miss them and are clearly not over them. It’ll make your date feel nervous and make them feel like they’re the rebound. Also don’t talk about things you’ve done with your exes it may make your date really uncomfortable.

 

Don’t Get Personal: On a first date no body wants to listen to your problems or “your story”. Leave the "storytelling" for the future. Conversations on a first date should be left simple, flirtatious and not too informal.

 

Separate Bills:  Insist on paying for yourself on the first date, unless the other person says or even insists they’d pay for it. You shouldn’t take it for granted that, since they asked you out, then they should pay for you.

The Wives of Nelson Rolihlahla "Madiba" Mandela.

Nelson and Evelyn

Nelson Mandela was first married to a nurse, Evelyn Ntoko Mase, in 1944 and they had two sons and 2 daughters one of whom died at nine months old leaving three surviving children. They were married for 14 years.  Although their marriage didn't last as Evelyn became a Jehovah's Witness and greatly resented Mandela's political performance. This then turned the marriage sour and sullen.  Accusing him of adultery, they divorced in 1958. 

Nelson and Winnie

Nelson Mandela saw and fell in love with Nomzamo Winfreda Zanyiwe Madikizela, a beautiful but violent woman who was 16 years his junior and they got married in 1958. Their 38-year marriage, blessed with two children, ended when they separated in April 1992 after it was revealed she had been unfaithful to her husband during his imprisonment.  The couple divorced in March 1996 and she then adopted the surname Madikizela-Mandela.  A controversial activist, she is popular among her supporters, who refer to her as the 'Mother of the Nation', yet reviled by others after the South African Truth and Reconciliation commission found "Ms Winnie Madikizela Mandela politically and morally accountable for the gross violations of human rights", concluding that she had personally been responsible for the murder, torture, abduction and assault of numerous men, women and children, as well as indirectly responsible for even larger number of such crimes. In March 2009, the Independent Electoral Commission ruled that Madikizela-Mandela, selected as an ANC candidate, could run in the April 2009 general election, despite her suspended jail sentence for fraud.

Nelson and Graca

Nelson Mandela married Graca Machel in 1998 while he was still the incumbent President of South Africa thereby making Graca the first woman in the world to have been First Lady of two countries, serving first as the First Lady of Mozambique from 1975 to 1986 and the First Lady of South Africa from 1998 to 1999.  She was his wife until his death on December 5, 2013.

Harassed boyfriend jumped to his death after his girlfriend insisted on going into another clothes shop

Tao Hsiao, 38, is carried out of the shopping mall on a stretcher but he was pronounced dead. He jumped to his death after a furious row with his girlfriend in a shopping mall

There's probably more to his reaction that meets the eye!

 

A man jumped to his death after a furious row with his girlfriend who insisted they go into another clothes shop.

 

CCTV shows Tao Hsiao, 38, escorting his girlfriend around a shopping mall in Xuzhou, Jiangsu province, east China.

 

After five hours Tao finally had enough and demanded to go home.

 

Eyewitnesses say he could be heard saying they already had more bags than they could carry, but she insisted on going into one more shop where the was a special offer on shoes.

 

An eyewitness said: 'He told her she already had enough shoes, more shoes that she could wear in a lifetime and it was pointless buying any more.

 

'She started shouting at him accusing him of being a skinflint and of spoiling Christmas, it was a really heated argument.'

 

The shouting match ended when the man chucked the bags on the floor and jumped over the balcony, smashing into Christmas decorations on his way down before hitting the floor seven stories below causing shocked shoppers to flee in panic.

 

Emergency services arrived at the scene but Tao was killed immediately from the impact of the fall.

 

A shopping spokesman said: 'His body was removed fairly quickly.

 

'He actually landed on one of the stalls below and then fell to the floor so although the store was damaged it meant he didn't hit anybody.

 

'This is a tragic incident, but this time of year can be very stressful for many people.'

 

Source: DailyMail

He Will Never Be Ready to Commit if.....

Does your boyfriend's attitude keeps you guessing if he is the committing type?  Do you often wonder how soon that will be that is if he ever will?

You know he will never commit if:

1. He’s Clooney-esque in attitude (as in being a bachelor for life, but likely not as good looking). The longest relationship he’s had is two years, and then he breaks it off using some lame excuse that wouldn’t hold up at the post office.

2. He charms the panties off of you--literally. Then you slept with him and it suddenly seems  he’s not as “into” you as he once was. Even coffee together the next morning takes on a dark pallor.

3. His eyes gloss over when you talk about yourself or your interests. He would rather keep the conversation focused on what matters: him. If he talks about himself in the third person, or talks about the future in the first person singular, just run.

4. He makes empty promises that he can’t keep. Remind him and he will pretend to have forgotten.  It’s not that he has to work on a big project, it’s that he’d rather go out with the girl he met last night.

5. After a few dates, he’ll start talking about how effed up he is. And how he thinks he may be depressed or confused. You think. “Poor guy, I can help.” I like to think of this as preparing for his grand exit. It’s really just another way of saying it's not you, it’s me.

He will never be ready for commitment however long you stayed with him.  Just run before your sell-by date arrives and finds you still on the shelf.

Your 'Friend' is a 'Frenemy' (An Enemy in Friend Clothing) If....

Frenemies, we all have them.  It's just that we often totally trust them that we fail to see them for what they really are. A frenemy is usually someone you looked upon as a friend, someone you loved and confided in but who leaves you feeling you are fraternizing with the enemy.  A frenemy will put on a good face when you are around them but, underneath, are seething with hatred, bitterness and resentment for you.

 

It's hard enough to be hated, but when you're hated by someone you trusted, it's a nightmare. The betrayal will cut you to the core.

 

You know your "friend" is a frenemy if:

1. Your "friend" needs you or something from you, you make sure to be there or do it for them. But the moment you need them or something from them, they are never there. 
2. A warning bells always rings, telling you that you should not under any circumstances trust this person but you are unable to pinpoint why.
3.  The comments they make about you are underhanded jabs that leave you feeling worse about yourself than ever.
4. They pretend to be happy for you when things are going well but you can tell the smile doesn't reach their eyes as opposed to when things are going badly for you.  When something positive happens to you, your frenemy downplays it and makes it sound like a fluke.
5. They never rise to your defence when others talk trash about you.
6. They offer you a shoulder to cry on, but something tells you it is because they want to hear and relish in the details of what might have made you cry.
7. You start to notice that you are never able to say how you truly feel when you talk to them because you don't want to piss them off.
8. You find they talk trash about you behind your back and will pursue every opportunity, with gusto, to run you down.
9. They make you think only their opinion counts by making yours seem childish.
10. They never bother to call or return your calls; unless when they need something from you.

The above are a few signs you need to look out for in order to protect yourself before you give too much to someone, only to be stabbed in the back later.

They are Literally Saying 'I am a Serial Dater' If....

 

There's no doubting the fact that there are many people in the dating world who are really looking for commitment. Conversely, there's no doubting the fact that there are many others who are only there for the thrill having someone new brings.  In your search for a potential partner to go into a committed relationship with, you could come across people known as “serial daters.” These are people who love the dating game but only for the thrill of the chase and the feeling of going on a new date.

Serial daters act like their whole life depends on dating and often date several people at once, or they just go on a couple of dates with you and then quickly move on. This can of course be hurtful if you’re looking for a long-term relationship, so it’s important to be able to spot this kind of behavior.

You know you are dealing with a serial dater if:

They ignore, send non-committal or delayed messages.

If they sometimes seem distant or are delayed in replying your messages, or ignore you especially when you are both online on any chatting platform, it may be because they are talking with other people. It will be obvious if they are noncommittal in their replies that they are not giving their full attention to you, or if they abruptly change the topic of discussion to avoid answering your questions or take a day or two to give a response of any kind.

They confuse you with someone else!

If they are dating many people at once, they avoid addressing you by name or any form of endearment.  Also, they are likely to sometimes confuse you with other people they are speaking to. If they ask you how your day at the office was when you actually work from home, for example, this is when a warning bell should sound off. If when you correct them they get defensive, this is a sure sign they are trying to cover up.

They rush and want to rush into 'things'.

If they rush the conversation and don’t really ask you questions about you or your life, it’s clear that they don’t really want to get to know you. Similarly, if they want to meet you straight away, and after meeting they want to get intimate just as fast, they’re not a safe bet. All they’re looking for is the excitement of somebody new and they’re likely to be gone in a second as soon as they’ve had their fun.

Take yourself home pronto if your potential partner exhibits these signs.  After all, if you’re looking for love and commitment, a serial dater will just waste your time and potentially really hurt your feelings.  So remember, look out for those who don’t rush you, and who seem genuinely interested in you and what you have to say.

Will You Set Yourself on Fire and Let Others Watch You Burn? This Guy "Stephen" Just Did!!!!!!

Why anyone will burn themselves alive and stream it live online for people to watch beats me.  And as unbelievable as it sounds, there were people out there in the online world urging them on! Where are we headed?

Tragic: 'Stephen', 20, allegedly tried to kill himself on 4chan about 7pm Saturday night



• A 20-year-old man allegedly tried to kill himself on 4chan
• 4chan is an imageboard website allowing users to post anonymously
• 'Stephen' lit a fire as 200 people watched on a live video stream
• Footage shows him being pulled out by firefighters
• It is not known if he survived

A disturbed young man has shocked North America after he tried to kill himself by setting his room on fire while 200 people watched on an online messageboard.

The 20-year-old identified himself only as 'Stephen' but is thought to be a student in Canada and announced on the anonymous 4chan that he intended to commit suicide and broadcast the event for others to see.

Disturbingly, scores of online users signed up to watch the suicide attempt and helped the man to set up the video stream for the 'an hero' - online slang for suicide attempt.

 

 

Horrific: 'Stephen' posted this note on 4chan explaining why he was trying to commit suicide

After 200 users had signed up to his video stream, 'Stephen' swallowed a handful of pills and drank vodka lighting a fire in the corner of his room about 7pm on Saturday.

He retreated under his bed as smoke appeared to billow around him.

4chan is an imageboard website allowing users to post anonymously.  

'As an oldf*g who’s been on 4chan since 2004, I thought I would finally give back to the community in the best possible way,' he wrote on the notorious imageboard.

'I am willing to an hero [commit suicide] on cam for you all.

 

'All that I request is for you guys to link me to a site where I am able to stream it for you guys.'

 

 

 

Strange community: 200 viewers watched as Stephen's room filled with smoke and firefighters pulled him from the room

The Daily Dot reported another user set up a video chatroom on streaming website Chateen which 'Stephen' joined.

 

'Stephen' used the username LOLDoge, a reference to a meme featuring a photo of a Shiba Inu dog that is popular on 4chan.
 

With 200 viewers - the maximum allowed on Chateen - watching him and even more trying to get in, Stephen downed booze and pills before setting his room alight.

As the camera rolled, he crawled under the bed where he typed: '#imdead #omgimonfire' and 'I’m f*ck3d'.

The troubling video, still available online, shows firefighters pulling him out of the smokey room.

 

A number of viewers disturbingly encouraged 'Stephen' during his suicide attempt, while others clamored to view the horrific scene.

One wrote: 'Let's all of us use his photo as wallpaper for one week. He's doing it.'

 

Another who was frustrated at not being to watch the suicide attempt because the chat room was full wrote: 'Leave someone so we can join.'

 

Another anonymous user wrote: 'PROVIDE PICS ROOM IS FULL DAMN IT.'
 

As 200 viewers watched, 'Stephen' ingested pills and vodka, lit a fire with his toaster and hid under his bed

 

The disturbing video captured the moment firefighters pulled 'Stephen' out of the smokey room. It is not known whether he is still alive

 

It is not known whether 'Stephen' survived the fire.

YourAnonNews, a Twitter account associated with the hacktivist group Anonymous, reported that Stephen was the fatality in a Spring Garden, Pittsburgh, house fire, cited in a Pittsburgh Post-Gazette article.

Other users say he is an injured student from the University of Guelph in Ontario, Canada.

According to the Guelph Mercury, one person was injured in a dorm room fire on campus.

CTV reported that the cause of the campus fire has not yet been released but added that the fire department said there's evidence it may have been set deliberately.

An anonymous user tonight posted their own account of the incident, claiming 'Stephen' had taken prescription drugs in his dorm room, cheated on his girlfriend, was disowned by his parents and 'in debt for useless degree'.
 

They wrote fire crews arrived on scene 20 minutes after 'Stephen' lit the fire and he is now injured in hospital.
 

'Stephen' has quickly become the subject of cruel taunts on the message board, being dubbed 'Toaster Steve'.

Culled from: Daily Mail

24-Hour Curfew Imposed on Maiduguri, Nigeria, Following an Attack by Suspected Boko Haram Members

 

Seems the end has not been heard of Boko Haram.

 

The Borno government on Monday imposed a 24-hour curfew on Maiduguri metropolis following an attack by suspected members of the Boko Haram sect in some parts of the state capital.

 

Alhaji Ahmed Jidda the Secretary to the State Government, announced the decision in a statement released to newsmen in Maiduguri.

 

The statement said that the curfew was imposed in consultation with the 7 Division of the Nigerian Army in Maiduguri.

 

“During the period of curfew, government pleads with all citizens to remain calm.

 

“Only vehicles on emergency calls and essential services are allowed to move while the curfew will be lifted as soon as situation improves, ‘’ it added.

 

“The imposition of the curfew is necessitated by an attack in Maiduguri by people suspected to be Boko Haram members in the early hours of today.”

 

The apparently large attack in a major urban centre will cast further doubt on military claims that the Islamist insurgents have been pushed into remote, more rural parts of the northeast.

 

The military on Saturday said they would tighten security in communities near Nigeria’s northern and eastern borders with Chad, Niger and Cameroon due to fears about Boko Haram strikes over the Christmas and New Year period.

 

Army spokesman Ibrahim Attahiruon Monday said  that one of the attacks struck near the city’s airport but he was not able to provide further details.

 

The phone network has been down in Borno state since mid-May, when a state of emergency was declared in the area.

 

The military said the shutdown would help block militants from coordinating attacks but with no working mobile phone service, details of the conflict in the area have been difficult to verify.

 

The latest violence began at around 3:00 am (0200 GMT) and included bomb and gun attacks,

Boko Haram was founded in Maiduguri more than 10 years ago and has attacked the city repeatedly.

 

Source: Vanguard

Ethan Hawke's Shocking Take on Fidelity

 

Uma Thurman's ex seems to be defending extra-marital affairs here.

 

Hear him claim in an interview granted to Mr Porter's November 2013 issue:

 

'Sexual fidelity can't be the whole thing you hang your relationship on. People have such a childish view of monogamy and fidelity; '"he's cheated so he's bad, she's cheated so she's bad," as opposed to a recognition that our species is not monogamous,' he continued.
 

'To act all indignant, that your world has been rocked because your lover wasn't faithful to you, is a little bit like acting rocked that your hair went grey.'

I wonder if he would be feeling the same way if it were Uma that was rumoured to have cheated with the help.

 

 

Miranda Kerr in New Relationship?

30-year-old Victoria's Secret's Angel and Orlando Bloom's ex, Miranda Kerr, is rumored to be dating Australia's richest man, James Packer, 46.

 

They are reported to have begun a relationship just months after they and their former spouses all enjoyed a holiday in Tahiti together.

 

It was three months ago that Mr. Packer and his model wife Erica Baxter, three months ago, announced that their six-year marriage was over while Miss Kerr and her Pirates of the Caribbean Actor husband Orlando Bloom also ended their three-year marriage only in October.

 

Mr. Packer, who is increasing his billion-pound fortune by buying casinos, and his now ex-wife, Erica, have been long-term friends with Miss Kerr and her now ex, Mr. Bloom.

 

They all enjoyed a holiday together in luxury resorts in Tahiti last year and then came the announcement that their marriages had broken down this year.

 

Are we missing something?